#7 Trying

One of my favorite artists is The Japanese House. Many lyrics she’s written blow me away, but there’s one in particular from her song ‘Sad to Breathe’ that goes:

“I forget… I can’t tell if the things I have I just don’t want, or the things I want I just don’t get…”

Every time I hear it my eyes well up a bit. I don’t think I’m a very dissatisfied person, but there are moments when I’ll get caught up in the details of some grand, creative idea I have and can so clearly visualize and then not be able to explain it to someone. Or, I’ll lay out a laundry list of reasons it can’t be done in my head because of whatever skills or resources I’m lacking, without looking around and using or appreciating what it is I already have, and then I feel bad about all that. It must be me, I’ll think. What if I can’t have the things I want because of me? And asking for help just leaves more room for misunderstanding, and I fear being misunderstood… Filing all this into ‘Subjects to Explore When I Find a New Therapist.’

Overall, I’ve been feeling positive and capable lately, which is a not to be taken for granted! But, god… that lyric is so good. It makes me zoom out of whatever I’m doing and check in with myself. How comforting to find art that strikes a chord with your experience, and so succinctly.